Gratitude

I used to think I knew myself pretty well but, I'm still learning. I am very prone to anxiety and depression. I guess subconsciously I knew this but, I didn't allow myself to vocalize it until after Azure was born and I had PPD. (PPD doesn't have as bad as a stigma as just plain ole depression.) One of the main reasons I didn't have PPD again this time was because of the outpouring of love and support I have received from family and friends.

I didn't have to cook a real meal for the first 4 wks after Zeke was born because friends from church brought meals and my mom and in laws took us out to dinner. And they helped me clean! Every week for the first month I had at least someone (sometimes more than 1) take Azure and Vince for a few hours so that I could get some sleep. It was so nice to have a handful of people I could rely on for help. Most of the time I didn't even have to ask. Friends just called and texted- "when can I take the kids for you?" "What day can I bring a meal?" That is much more helpful than asking, "Let me know if I can do anything for you." I also had a dear friend of mine send a very thoughtful gift that means so much to our family, esp to Zekiel and me.

2 weeks ago Charles went on a ski trip with the young men from church. I was kind of dreading him going b/c I would be alone with all 3 kids. A close friend of mine, who was my first ever roommate my freshman year of college, "just happened" to email me to ask if she could come down from Boston for a week to help me out! She was heaven sent. There aren't many things in life I enjoy more than spending time/talking with friends who really know and love me. Such a blessing.

I am even more motivated than before, after receiving so much love and help to reach out to others that are struggling. Especially to women after having a baby. Pay it forward.