Time hurry up, time slow down

This evening we wanted to take a drive to the Boise National Forest to see some land that we are considering purchasing for a home. Charles has been up there a few times, yet I have not. But, just before dinner Zeke was running around screaming, biting Vince, and throwing things around. We knew if we made the drive, he would just scream the whole way and everyone would be miserable so we decided not to go.

He is almost 2 and a half and he's been doing this since he was 9 months old or so. (the screaming in the car) This is a long stage and we're tired of it. It's amazing that we take as many trips as we do with him. It gets increasingly more difficult. I am always in awe to see how calm other children are his age. I guess Vince was pretty laid back, at least in the car.

The passing of time is such a strange phenomenon. Last night, I emptied out my Caboodle that I've had since 1995 or so. I had old makeup in there from 8th grade! As I opened the lid to my old lip glosses the scent overcame me and I was transported back to those times. Was that really 20 years ago?! 20 years ago I was 14.

So, I know that this stage will pass in the blink of an eye, but it doesn't make it any easier now. And, it is so unhelpful for people to say "Enjoy every moment." I think it's not only ok, but that it is healthy to acknowledge that things are hard and disappointing.

I vow to never say to young mothers when I am a grandmother, "Enjoy every moment." Some moments suck and that's ok. That is life. I want to look back and remember the good more than the bad, yet I don't want to forget that this is hard. And, even though it's hard, I still feel deeply satisfied with my life which is strange.

Time hurry up, time slow down...

Settling in

April was a crazy month as well. We love our new house. Our backyard is landscaped so nicely and it is fairly large. Larger than we've ever had. We have lots of big windows that let in lots of natural light and it's glorious. We even have a sunroom :) There is a walking path behind our house that leads right to Azure's new school. Trail Wind Elementary is rated a 9 out of 10 and is less than a mile from our house. She walks to and from school everyday! What a big girl! So crazy! I'm grateful for her new sense of freedom and the time she has to ponder and pray as she walks alone. What a great time in life. This stage is truly a fulfillment of our heartfelt prayers since before Charles and I even met. How wonderful!

Though, we are still living out of boxes. Nothing hangs on our walls as of yet. I'm struggling to find something to replace Vince's preschool. Our activities together last no longer than 20 mins usually. He still has a hard time playing independently. He usually needs me, Zeke or Azure to play with. We'll just have to wait for summer camps and then Kindergarten in Aug.

 

Zeke continues to be difficult. While he was staying with his grandparents, he got a bacterial infection on his finger somehow. He was on antibiotics and his fingernail recently fell off. He's all better, but the nail still looks disgusting. He has at least one tantrum a day. I'm looking into energy healing for him as it feels he has some trapped anger inside him. If anyone has any experience with that, please let me know. When he's happy he is a complete joy and his curly, blonde hair enraptures me and I am smitten with him and his sweet sounding voice. He is now saying Vince's name very clearly which I think started right before we moved at the end of March, but it wasn't until we got here that he started saying it daily.

He drove us to lunacy for about 4 weeks (last 2 wks of March and beginning of April) by taking off his diaper and flinging and smearing his feces all over the place. So badly, that we had to throw out the pack and play that I received as a gift from my freshman roommate at Azure's baby shower. He started doing it the first day he slept in the pack and play after Charles dissembled his crib back in Savannah. He continued to do it nightly on our trip out here, in the hotel and at our friend's homes. He got poop all over Cabe's carpet and his grandparent's. 

I even pinned him, but he took both pins off! We finally wised up on how to do it, so it stopped. It was a rough time cleaning up poop everyday for weeks as we were moving and trying to unpack. I completely snapped our first Sunday here in the house when he did it for the 20th time while Charles and I were napping. Sigh. So grateful our new pin technique is working and we haven't had to clean it up since that Sunday.

 
Nothing is perfect, but I feel a deep satisfaction with our current stage of life. I am madly in love with Charles with each passing day and we're working as a team to raise our children together in the gospel of Jesus Christ. Flying feces, high pitched screams, and towering boxes aside, life is good.

The Jensens move back West

2015 has been a whirlwind so far. In January Charles was contacted by St. Luke's Health System in Boise, ID about the position he applied for 3 years ago after his residency. It was available again and they offered to fly him out for an interview.

Sometimes you don't get to see why things don't work out, but it's been a blessing to know that 3 years ago when this job didn't work out the first time, the Lord was preparing Charles to take it in the future.

We found out in February that he had been accepted for the position and we have been preparing to move ever since.

We left Savannah on Tues morning March 31st and got to Boise around 9:30pm on Easter Sunday April 5th.

I love change and new adventures, but moving is hard. It's hard to say goodbye to the things you love- like warm humid air enveloping you almost constantly. Beautiful green live oaks, friends you can call up last minute to come babysit your kids (Shelly).

It's hard living on the road and in hotels for almost 2 weeks. It's been hard on Azure and Vince. They were used to their school schedule going to bed and waking up early. Now, we have no schedule and are all over the place spending most of the day in the car or in the hotel. Vince has been so defiant and it breaks my heart. I've never seen him act like this before- talking back and misbehaving so much. Where did my sweet boy go?!

Such a wide range of emotions. I also found out on my birthday that my 7 week pregnancy was no longer. I had been waiting to bleed to pass it on my own and was afraid I'd have to schedule a D&C as soon as we got to Boise having no insurance yet. Gratefully the Lord answered my prayer and I started bleeding on my own Sunday night as soon as we got to our hotel.

It has been rough, yet we also feel so blessed. I almost got hit by a car in El Paso, but the car stopped just in time. Shelly, our friend from Savannah drove out with us and helped us with the kids. Cammen, my freshman roommate met up with us in Louisiana and bought us breakfast. Caleb, Charles' brother let us stay at their house and cooked us an amazing dinner. Another friend of ours from Savannah let us stay with them in Thatcher, AZ and cooked us breakfast.

Best friend status: taking care of all of my kids :)

Cousins playing soccer

Me & Cammen: 16 yrs of friendship

I got to see Randa, my MTC companion on the exact day, April 3rd, that we entered the MTC together and met. It had been 13 years!! She would have housed us as well but, we went and stayed with Miah in Yucca.

And, then it "just so happened" that we ended up at my in laws on Easter Sunday and got to celebrate with them and Jon and Erin and their kids. Our children got to see all their aunts, uncles and cousins minus Jen and Zed who's on his mission in Finland on the Jensen side during our cross country road trip.

No Easter dress- she lost 2 cardigans on this trip

Monday we started looking for places to live and on Wed we decided on one, applied and got accepted. We're grateful it only took 3 days. We get to move in tomorrow!

Another one of my old roommates lives here in Boise and she watched Azure and Vince for a few hours to quell their boredom and give Charles and I a break from their bickering (something they're only begun to do frequently the past few months). I have been messaging a girl that I'm in a Facebook group with, whom I've never met, yet she offered to watch our kids and feed us dinner. We finally met her tonight and the kids loved jumping on their tramp and playing in their backyard. My in laws have been watching Zeke all week so we could find a place without his shenanigans. (Though Azure & Vince definitely made up for his shenanigans while he was gone!)

I'm constantly relearning in my life that there really are silver linings to everything. It's such a testament to me of God's goodness. There are countless blessings if that is what you're focused on. That doesn't mean that life will always be happy, easy, or good, but for one door God closes, He truly opens another, or at least a window. I praise His goodness!!

{New Boise sights}

Lake Lovell

Only 13 mins from the temple instead of 3 hrs!!!

Such gorgeous Spring colors!

Cafe Rio!